Excuse this post it may seem a little emo but I feel like posting something good and emotional:

I don't remember exactly when I had this dream but it was quite a bit ago right after Christmas break last year maybe, I've only told two people about it ever, just because it bothers me so much. I'm going to post it here just to see if anyone has any wise comments or words of wisdom or something....I dont know... anyways here it is:

I was driving down the street in a nice car, it was sunny with a few of those poofy clouds that look like shapes. I'm tapping on the steering wheel singing along to the radio... things were going great. I came to this really steep hill, thinking nothing of it I continue my drive. I press the brakes to slow myself a bit. at the bottom of the hill is a guard rail wrapping around a cliff that leads to some factories and such below, a good 300 or 500 feet. However my brakes dont work, in a panic i stomp and stomp. My face fills with fear as all I can do is stare out the window as I come closer and closer from hammering into the guard rail and flipping over the cliff. Finally it happens; the car smacks into the front of the rail, lifting the back tires up, flipping the car straight up and over the cliff. Somehow I get ejected from the car and I start to free fall.

Then I think to myself this is pretty scary, it must be a dream... ah at least i'll wake up when I hit the ground. I was still scared as I fell though. Now usually when I have dreams like this I do wake up when I hit the ground, these types of dreams are a common occurence for me, but this time was different. I smacked into the ground with out waking up. I layed there for a few moments. I felt my body begin to lift up and I floated away from the accident scene. In a blink of an eye, I was in this room.

The room was quite possibly one of the most beautiful places i've ever been in. It was stained glass from ceiling to floor. The Floor i walked on was windowed with the stain, and it soared upwards just eye to eye stained glass into a triangular peak at the top of the room. Like the inside of a temple I guess. Suddenly, the room opened up at the top. A bright light shone down on me. I didn't hear a voice, I didn't see a face. I could feel this presence though, something i cant describe. The only thing I could think to myself was wow, this is it... This light was magnificent and it filled the room, reflecting and bouncing off of every piece of stained glass there was. I was in awe.

Suddenly, the light went out. The roof shut. The floor shook. The glass shattered. Shards of glass fell down beside me as a giant rumble shook the room. The windows all above me broke into millions of pieces and came tumbing down. Then the floor all around me shattered. I started to fall. The glass cut into me as I began a descent into nowhere. I fell and the only thing I could see were grey clouds hovering below me and the glass shards scattered about racing me downwards. "I didn't make it" I said to myself.

...then I woke up.

  posted by Darrell @ 3:17 AM

 
A few months ago I released a guide on "how to be smooth" if followed you should've had no problem getting that girl you like out on a date. Last month I followed it up with the guide on "how to keep the girl". That should've helped you keep her around along enough to introduce her to the parents. Now that she's been around awhile it's time you two start setting the rules. Thus I bring you "Setting the rules"

Note: this is written strictly from the male perspective and for the male to govern over his girl, not vice versa.

Step 1.) Intiating the rule making: Every good relationship is governed by a good set of rules. Making the rules may seem uncomfortable at first but in the long run it will benefit both you and the female. I always like to initiate my rules by just bluntly saying "Ok new rule......." I'm sure you can come up with a creative way to do so.

Step 2.) Make sure she knows that you are in control of the relationship. I cannot stress how important this is. Too many of my friends are becoming more whipped day by day. In fact, one of my friends can't even pick out his own clothes anymore. *makes whip noise* We do not want this to happen. Once they are in control it's all over. Make sure your rules get the point across that you are your own man.

The Basic Rules : These are the basics, feel free to add more rules in the comment section of this post to share with the rest of us.

1.) If asked "Does this make me look fat" expect no guilt trip for an honest answer.
2.) When hungry, the girl should do the cooking. If the male feels like cooking he may. In general however it should be the female.
3.) If you use negative reinforcement make sure she isn't blabbing it all over town to everyone. (Try not to leave marks, it makes it easier)
4.) A back rub should be no less than 10 minutes, anything less is simply a tease.
5.) Dishes, laundry, vacuuming should all be for the female. Taking out trash, fixing the car....etc are for the male.
6.) If you have to go to the ballet, she has to go to a hockey game
7.) If your favorite tv show is on, talking is permitted during commercials and commercials only. No distrations will be permitted
8.) The male should have full control over what is playing on the car radio. No Delilah permitted
9.) The Female must always inform the male when she is taking him to see parental figures.
10.) PDA is acceptable in moderation. However no cutsie nicknames in public.

Thats all I have for now. If you guys have any rules that would benefit our relationships, post them in the comments!

  posted by Darrell @ 10:34 PM