How to be smooth: A guide on being smooth


Many people often ask me how I'm so darn smooth. It's not easy, but with time and practice maybe you too will someday be as smooth as I. I've written up this guide on smoothness for you amatuers. Here are a few quick tips

1.) Practice one liners in the mirror, make sure your facial expression, eyebrow raise and click wink are perfected to the T. Start off something like this: Standing straight looking directly into the mirror, do not avert your eyes from your reflection, deliver a line like "Is it hot in here, or is that just you?" Tilt your head to the side, throw a wink (doing this simutaneously takes some practice) with your tongue make a "click" sound then pretend to shoot them with your fingers formed in the shape of a gun. Altogether it should look something like this:

"Is it hot in here, or is that just you" Tilt, wink, click, shoot. (takes some practice)

2.) Always carry something with you that can help deliver a line. For instance a sugar packet comes in handy for the "You dropped your name tag" line. Me, and many of my friends carry these in our wallets. Other convient accesories could include, but not limited to: A cute picture of a puppy, A baby picture of one of your cousins (make sure the baby is cute though), Your own personal card with phone number, email, and screenname.


3.) Dont be afraid of rejection, if she's a nice girl she can only reject you so much. Some easy ways around the rejection fear are lines like this: "Hey want to hang out sometime?" This is an almost fullproof line as the girl, unless she is a complete a-hole will not say No. She will be forced to say yeah sure or at the worst she will say she can't tonight. The key is to pursue that other time. Don't let up, eventually she'll have to go set a date and hang out with you.

4.) Plan more dates during your first one in case it's a pity date (like in many cases mine are) . An example of this would be for the first date to go play pool, or some competitive activity and prior to playing make a bet that somehow requires a second date. I.e whoever wins owes the other person a dinner later that week. (Dont make her pay for the dinner even if she wins guys, thats a no no)

5.) Sometimes you have to be a bit sneaky. What I mean by this is to fool a girl into a little one on one time with you. For example, tell a girl that you and a bunch of your friends are heading to the movies, then fail to inform your other friends about the movie, thus leaving you and the girl one on one to the movie.

Thats that for now, I will maybe add to this list in the future. Keep it smooth

-D


  posted by Darrell @ 4:49 PM

 
Post CaMp Post

25 Antique shops, 5 tire tubes and 32 hot dogs later, we all made it back in one piece. The weekend was spent doing manly things, we started off with an attempt at biking the trails, but for some reason our tires kept popping (Mine and Nick's) so instead of biking we spent the first day setting up camp and getting food, and getting more tubes for our bikes. We went through 16 hot dogs all in one night, we thought those were going to last us the whole weekend too. But I guess we forget that nick wasnt taking his diet into account this week. Next we finally gave our bikes a pep talk and convinced them not to pop any more and went for an 8 or so mile ride. We all had our moments of misery, Nick fell off a few times, Rob began to sweat more than a dog in heat, I threw up after peddling up one of the steep inclines and joe, well joe was to blame for all our popped tires. His so called "patches" didnt have too much of an effect. The weekend continued with us biking some more and scoping out some lame beach, and then going to a better beach with lots of waves and chicks (Joe got an eyeful) Some of the highlights include:

Nick falling off his bike trying to go over a jump
Joe getting an eyeful of a little somethin somethin at the beach
Me trying to learn how to spit properly
The white james earl jones, and his son nick, teaching us how to build a campfire and to be weary of racoons (these guys were our neighbors)
Us moving the tent down 8 campsites without folding it up
Making the hottest fire we could then putting it out with pee. (we did this about 3 or 4 times)
Attempt to get chicks to come back to our site for a marshmallow cook off. (They had to work... however they did ask us if we were staying all summer or if we'd be back soon)
A man in a truck telling us "Hey guys dont fight! Its summer time!" when we were debating where we should go to eat. (He then proceeded to cut us off)

Pics will be up soon, stay tuned we took plenty.

Also, no beach club this weekend for I have been called to work

  posted by Darrell @ 3:20 PM